lily34's secret shame?
 
She never partied like it was 1999... when it actually was 1999.

buddy puts a hammin' cheese samwich into a mug of ovaltine and
calls it a breaderage. (Bread + beverage = breaderage, stupid.)

 VV wrote:

VV wears kevlar underpants for such occasions.

Santa's elves are equipped with tasers, just in case VV tries to sit on his lap again.

 triskele wrote:

,,,astute... and true!

VV prefers the canned cranberry sauce.... finds the jiggling..... exciting. 

Give it up, Veev. Pantaloons are NOT going to be the ‘next hot thing’.

Way back when little VV was growing up on the family farm you could often hear the kids shouting,
hey Pa, VV's off kilter again! And pa would shout back, well, pop him back in! You see, Kilter was the
family's goat. Until Pa ate it. But who was Pa? 

Hey oldv!

For future reference... whenever you ask anyone "Hey wanna see my moobs?"... 
 
...just assume the answer will always be NO. 

For most families Thanksgiving is a chance to make treasured memories.
  
For SFW; however, it's just another chance to deliver his testosterone fueled yarns of teenage masturbatory hijinks to a captive audience.
 
 
 
"Strap in NANA, he's telling those dirty stories again!"

I just heard it through the grapevine that VV has a new job at the USPS for the Christmas rush season using his tongue for licking the string tape for sealing packages.  

Edit: the job title is Free Intern 

You know.... for someone who is not very athletic... haresfur sure does have a big collection of sports bras.

A 12 year old SFW kicked at the ground and wiped away dirty tears as he shouted at his tormenters saying: "I'm not a NOBODY!!! I'm a SOMEBODY and I'm smart, not dumb and I'll show you all! I'm going to move away and become a multi-millionaire businessman and never have to see you again!!!!
 
...and with that, SFW's mom turned to his dad and said: "He's all talk... he'll be home in time for dinner".

GeneP59 is still waiting for his mountain of cash on account of him helping out an internet Nigerian Prince with his frozen assets.

I hear that Lily34 originated the saying, “ don’t make me put a cap in your azz”. That’s a bottle cap.  

VV grew up with a poster of Kenny Rogers over his bed, it’s still there.

geoff_morphini has the dubious distinction as having been the only infant ever birthed rectally. 

 geoff_morphini wrote:


   

Lily34 likes to surprise older men by randomly sitting on their laps and saying “My name is Ivanka, are you my daddy?”