I took my dad to the mall yesterday to buy him some new shoes (he is 92).
We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was watching a teenager next to him.
The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange and blue.
My dad keep staring at him.
The teenager would look at him and find him staring every time.
When the teenager had had enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?"
Knowing my dad, I quickly swallowed my food so I wouldn't choke on his response, knowing he would have a good one. And in classic style, he did not bat an eye in his response.
"Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was wondering if you were my son."

I took my dad to the mall yesterday to buy him some new shoes (he is 92).
We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was watching a teenager next to him.
The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange and blue.
My dad keep staring at him.
The teenager would look at him and find him staring every time.
When the teenager had had enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?"
Knowing my dad, I quickly swallowed my food so I wouldn't choke on his response, knowing he would have a good one. And in classic style, he did not bat an eye in his response.
"Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was wondering if you were my son."

I took my dad to the mall yesterday to buy him some new shoes (he is 92).
We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was watching a teenager next to him.
The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange and blue.
My dad keep staring at him.
The teenager would look at him and find him staring every time.
When the teenager had had enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?"
Knowing my dad, I quickly swallowed my food so I wouldn't choke on his response, knowing he would have a good one. And in classic style, he did not bat an eye in his response.
"Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was wondering if you were my son."

After numerous rounds of, “We don’t know if Osama is still alive,” Osama himself decided to send Ted Kennedy a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game. Kennedy opened the letter which appeared to contain a single line of coded message, 370HSSV-0773H. Kennedy was baffled, so he e-mailed it to John Kerry. Kerry and his aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI. Noone could solve it at the FBI, so it went to the CIA, then to the NSA. With no clue as to its meaning, the FBI finally asked Marine Corps Intelligence for help. Within a few seconds the Marine Corps cabled back with this reply, “Tell Kennedy he’s holding the message upside down.”

My wife called out from the bedroom asking, "Do you ever get a shooting pain across your body, like someone has a voodoo doll of you and is stabbing at it?"
I replied, No."
After a short pause she then asked, "How about now?"

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, “What is politics?” The dad says, “Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I’m the breadwinner of the family, so let’s call me capitalism. Your mother, she’s the administrator of the money, so we’ll call her the government. We’re here to take care of your needs, so we’ll call you the people. The nanny, we’ll consider her the working class. And your baby brother, we’ll call him the future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense.” The little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has soiled his diaper. The little boy goes to his parents’ room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny’s room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed. The next morning, the little boy says to his father, “Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now.” The father says, “Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about.” The little boy replies, “Well, while capitalism is screwing the working class, the government is sound asleep, the people are being ignored and the future is in deep shit.”